what goes on in the mind of someone like him?

what goes on in the mind of someone like him? I know his father was diagnosed schizophrenic but I don't know if that's it with him but he's sure as hell got something ridiculous going on in there. I have no patience anymore. You'd think after twenty years of this crap I'd either have got used to it or left but hey life's just not that simple. Maybe it's the fact that I now have my own money in the bank and don't feel so dependant on him that I can step back and deal with it all a bit better. This morning yet another series of examples (oh no not just one!). My friend from Montreal's wife is here visiting family and she brought her brother over the other night for dinner. A perfect example of what he's like, he just didn't shut up and I cd barely get a word in edgewise to find out anything about her brother or have the chat we girls wanted to about my friend and what he's been up to for the 30 years we were apart! So when she called this morning he unfortunately picked up the other phone. She had meant it to be a quick call to say she'll be back from Spain on Friday and we cd get together just the two of us and have a natter. However it turned into a lot longer phone call cuz he kept butting in, talking very loudly and repeating himself and doing everything he's spent 20 years screaming at me for doing! After the call, I pointed out that he was going on and on, and suddenly it's him trying to shout me down about how she had said she wanted to go and I asked her one another question. True but that was five minutes after she said she had to go because he had just kept talking and talking and my one last question was relevant to us getting together which got quickly answered and then the call ended. He seems to have conveniently forgotten the five minutes in between where he did all the talking!!! Then a few minutes ago another winning example. F1 qualifiers had finished so he just gets up and walks out of the room leaving the tv remote on the other side of the room. Sounds stupid I know but ten minutes later he comes back in having left the tv on horse racing (snooze), and announces he's going out to do things and starts to walk out again. I very quietly pointed out that the least he cd do is hand me the controls and not have left it on bloody horse racing and he's suddenly shouting at me that I should chill out, nobody died (which he seems to think is such a clever thing to say) as if I had tried to chop his arm off or something. I pointed out that I had not raised my voice in the slightest, that I merely requested that if he wasn't going to be watching it the least he cd have done was hand me the remote and he just proceeded to shout on for five minutes about everything I do to him. The world is about him of course, silly me for ever trying to point out how something he may have done affects me. Eventually he had to actually concede that I had a point, that it wd have been nice if he hadn't just walked away like nobody else existed when even when he's not there I always make a point of leaving the remotes where he can find them. Little things but I just thought it was selfish of him to just not think. The saddest part is he never cd actually just say sorry. Normal people this wd just be a two minute conversation; cd you at least give me the remote, (sarcastic tone) good grief leaving it on horse racing of all things (smile) - oh sorry yes (and passes me the remote). Over in two seconds, no-one upset. Instead a simple remark turns into a ten minute personal attack on me and not the slightest idea in his mind that he has ever done anything that might upset me for any reason cuz apparently he's perfect. I'm sick of it!!!!!! (Yes I cd have just got up and got it but 1) it's not that easy for me to get up especially on a day like this when my legs entirely ache and 2) that's not the point, he left it where he was sitting rather than considering the other person in the room). 20 years I've put up with him saying things like no wonder everybody hates you cuz you talk so much and cuz you say things like that (of course everyone in the world can be as offensive as they like to me but if I express an opinion, I'm aggressive and disgusting and have no right to be alive). The interesting thing is that recently we got to be around people who didn't consider him to be the centre of the universe, these were people who weren't really that interested in him, who wanted to talk to ME, hear what I had to say. This is a rare experience to be around people who noticeably found it a bit hard to take him talking so much, who didn't necessarily find everything he said so amusing as he thinks he is, people who actually noticed how he puts me down, interrupts me, talks over me, argues with everything I say, makes a big thing about how wrong I am and then promptly repeats almost word for word what I just said but when I said it it was wrong. He has been surrounded by the same "friends" for the last 30 years and he doesn't understand that people inside that group just accept him (and most of them behave the same way in truth) but people outside that circle don't necessarily see him quite the same way. His best friend for example will ask you a question and then when you start to answer he'll literally turn round and talk to someone else like you don't exist. Yet in Michael's opinion, I am the only one who interrupts him and cuts him off!!! Funny how he doesn't notice when someone else does it or especially when he does it to me, it's not wrong! It's like Nixon, he's never done anything illegal cuz when the President does something, it's NOT illegal. Hey ho he's gone out now so I have peace and I intend to do nothing and I'm not going to feel quilty about it either.